Never Known A Girl Like You Before
by Hope Meijer
Summary: Whilst in Sam's lab, Jack catches sight of something that he is going to regret looking at...implied SJ (Rating upped for one curse) COMPLETE
1. 01

Author's Note: Little humorous one-shot I randomly came up with after taking one look at this photo: www. jaffakree. pwp. blueyonder. co. uk/ jaffakree/ fact/ photoamanda.jpg (minus spaces) It might be a good idea to take a look at it before you read, but it's not necessary!

Ah...song to listen to whilst reading (if you have it) is 'Never Known A Girl Like You Before' by Edwyn Collins.

Dedicated to: Jill and Sam...For them challenging me to write this fic, and for our long discussions on Jack's reaction! (coughgooey puddle of droolcough) And Sam for being my beta (big hugs and kisses)

* * *

NEVER KNOWN A GIRL LIKE YOU BEFORE

* * *

_I've never known a girl like you before  
Now just like in a song from days of yore  
Here you come a-knockin', knockin' on my door  
And I've never met a girl like you before  
_

_You give me just a taste so I want more  
Now my hands are bleeding and my knees are raw  
'Cos now you've got me crawling, crawling on the floor  
And I've never known a girl like you before  
_

_You've made me acknowledge the devil in me  
I hope to God I'm talkin' metaphorically  
Hope that I'm talkin' allegorically  
Know that I'm talkin' about the way I feel  
And I've never known a girl like you before  
Never, never, never, never  
Never known a girl like you before  
_

_This old town's changed so much  
Don't feel like I belong  
Too many protest singers  
Not enough protest songs  
And now you've come along  
Yes you've come along  
And I've never met a girl like you before_

* * *

He stared at his in-tray for five minutes, considering. The stack was growing, having doubled since he became a general, and his out-tray still remained empty, apart from a few sheets of paper that he didn't dare check, most likely covered with a fine sheen of dust. He hated paperwork. And yet the position he accepted was one that was _mainly_ paperwork. And he had _known_ that when he accepted. He snorted. Idiot. 

Another glance at the report on his computer, and he sighed. He just wasn't going to get it done. Instead he grabbed his coffee cup and looked into it, growling when he saw it was empty. That was it. He'd go to Daniel, who most likely had a stash of freshly brewed coffee hiding in his lab. Maybe he could annoy the others as entertainment.

Thinking about it, it would probably be suicide venturing into Danny's lab. Last time he'd been there, he couldn't help but fiddle with a small artefact that had apparently been fragile. _Very_ fragile. So much so that he had been banned from going near anything Daniel was working on again. Oh well. Teal'C would most likely be in the gym, and he didn't feel like getting all sweaty yet...after just having a nice refreshing shower. So it was Carter.

Besides, he needed that report from her.

* * *

Her lab was dark when he approached it, but that was normal for her. She would often work through the day, so engrossed in the project that she didn't notice if her lights were on or not. He swore it would damage her eyesight one of these days. At least the klaxons were loud enough to bring her out of her reveries; otherwise he'd have to restrict her hours spent in the lab. Maybe that wasn't such a bad idea... 

"Carter? I need that report..."

Ah, she wasn't there. Just when he was relying on her to be there. Okay, so it wasn't a bad thing all things taken into consideration, but he _really_ needed that report...

He quickly checked her desk, rifling through pieces of paper, which contained drawings that made absolutely no sense to him whatsoever no matter which way up he held them. A few manila folders that lay neatly stacked to the side looked promising, but they only contained more of the drawings, and even more confusing words and numbers.

Sighing, he started to turn away when he caught sight of an envelope with the words 'Colonel Carter' scrawled on. Normally this wouldn't have been particularly out of the ordinary, but it happened to look very much like Teal'C's writing. And the Jaffa had very distinctive handwriting.

He assumed it was a report or something, but his curiosity got the better of him and he opened the top and pulled out a sheet of glossy paper. Checking to see that no one was around, he turned it over.

And gasped.

"Holy..."

* * *

Author's Note: God, I'm cruel. Yes, it's a one-shot in a few chapters! Already got them written, I just need to post them up here. So if you want the next one, review! 


	2. 02

Author's Note: Thank you all so much! I've never had so many reviews in one night for such a short chapter! Wow, your support is amazing!

Slash? No way! I hate slash...Besides, when it says 'implied SJ' then that's what it's going to be...

'Artifact'. See, that's what I thought it was too. Only my spellchecker didn't. It prefers 'artefact', so I allowed it to have its way this time. I consulted my trusty dictionary, and apparently 'artefact' means 'something made by human beings' (which kinda defeats the point seeing as it's alien, but...) and 'artifact' means 'see artefact'. They mean the same thing, so we won't argue about it...I'll use the 'i' spelling next time (as that was how I wanted to spell it the first time) and basically all that happened was me and my spellchecker having a disagreement.

* * *

The corner was comfy. Why were they looking at her like that? It hadn't been her idea.

"He has no idea you're here, Sam. You don't have to sit in the corner," Daniel coaxed.

She pouted. It was childish for her, but completely understandable in the current situation. "I like it down here. It's dark, and safe..." And they couldn't see the bright red blush that stained her cheeks.

Daniel shrugged and turned back to the laptop. He had made a bargain with a few of the security women, asking for them to patch through the live feed from the security cameras in Sam's lab to his laptop in return for a photo of him. He couldn't understand why they'd particularly want a photo of him, but apparently pretty much every young nurse and airwoman had a crush on him. And it was obvious to everyone but him.

The specific instructions were to start patching the feed through as soon as General O'Neill got up and headed towards Colonel Carter's lab, looking bored. Of course, it hadn't been a very long time to wait, and it left just enough time for Teal'C to slip into the lab and place the envelope where it would catch his eye before returning with Sam herself to Daniel's lab. Daniel had a call, and he had saved his documents and given them the go-ahead.

And so now he and Teal'C were watching the screen intently, waiting for Jack's reaction, and Sam was curled up in the corner, hoping against hope the floor would suddenly swallow her up.

* * *

He gulped. Woah.

Normally a photo of his 2IC wouldn't bother him. They had enough photos taken...press releases ("New advancements in Deep Space Telemetry"), updated security 'mug-shots' and pass photos...but _this_...

Even her in 'civvies' was a nice change to the shapeless BDU trousers. Her top was usually pushing regulations a bit; hugging her curves and leaving many of the men on base staring after her as she walked past obliviously, but her BDUs hid her legs and left everything to the imagination. Which Jack O'Neill was quite happy to do – imagine.

But even his fantasies (which were mostly classified) contained nothing like this. Okay, so many of them included a _lot_ less clothing between them, but...

Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter was leaning against a wall, staring rather seductively at the camera, her eyes lined with black kohl and red lips set slightly apart, revealing a hint of teeth. Her usually smooth and controlled hair had been mussed up slightly, giving her a wild look, and the black netted top she was wearing with the word 'Love' in bold type made her look impossibly slimmer. One hand was perched on her hip, and the other was pushing the hem of the top upwards slightly, revealing her flat stomach. The bottom of the image showed the rest of the top brushing the waistband of some jeans.

"...Crap."

This was _not_ what he'd expected. So now he was the commanding officer of a woman who could beat a man almost twice her size in hand-to-hand combat, blow up a star, build a naquadah reactor when it was required of her _and_ look like a pin-up model in her spare time.

Damn regulations.

* * *

Author's Note: One more chapter! I know this was short, but I like my cliffhangers. Review or you don't get the conclusion! Love you all! 


	3. 03

Author's Note: Sorry, I've been really busy the last few nights (RE coursework and a load of artwork to do in four days...) and got kinda distracted. Plus I had college on top of normal schooling, so I was stressed! But here's the next chapter!

* * *

This was just tormenting him. She looked so...he couldn't even think of the word. Mesmerised by those eyes, just inviting him to...

Well. He wasn't going to carry that particular train of thought on or he would wind up having a cold shower. A _very _cold shower.

He wasn't used to seeing her in anything like that. Sure, when they had team nights at their houses, she wore civvies, but it was usually just a sweater and jeans. Certainly nothing to get his pulse racing. Although he had caught himself staring at her backside, as she walked past him, more than once.

Thinking he heard something (his senses going into overdrive searching for anything that could possibly indicate someone was approaching when he knew he was doing something oh-so-wrong), he slid the photo back into the envelope, ever-wondering why it was _Teal'C's_ handwriting, and reluctantly placed the envelope back in its original position. Maybe he could sneak back in at some point and get a copy of it?

Damn...those eyes of hers were boring into him even when the photo wasn't in front of him. Serves him right for memorising it. That was going to be another week of sleepless nights...

* * *

Daniel's lab was probably the most likely place she would be if not in her own lab – although she was supposed to be off-duty. Although she didn't take much notice when she was off-duty – if she felt like it and she was supposed to be, she _might_ go home. He would have to order her to get a life again sometime soon.

"...But I didn't agree to it..."

He paused, knowing before he even got to the door that it was her voice. He had listened to her babble enough times. He would generally put up with her babble just to hear her voice. He never understood a damn thing she said.

"Yes you did."

"Not the leaving it out in full sight of my commanding officer part!"

He could mentally see Daniel shrugging at Sam, in that annoyingly innocent fashion only Daniel himself could pull off. "Well, you have to admit, Teal'C's quite the photographer..."

Teal'C? _He_ took the photo? Explained why it was his handwriting on the front...

"Look, Jack's apparently heading this way. If you don't want him to see you like that, you'd better get going."

There was a scuffling noise, and he panicked, knowing if she saw him standing two feet away from the doorway she would suspect his eavesdropping...

"Do you have a jacket?"

There was a snort of laughter from Daniel. "Why'd you wear it in the first place?"

"...Only thing I had left in my locker after the 'photo shoot'."

Oh, this he had to see.

"Good afternoon, campers!" He strode round the corner into the lab, grinning despite himself when he saw Daniel's rabbit-caught-in-headlights look and Sam's already red cheeks growing impossibly redder.

And then he saw why she had been worried. Damn, that top looked better in real life...

"S-sir!" Ah, gotcha.

He nodded. "Carter, aren't you supposed to be off-duty? You were given downtime this week..."

"I know, sir...I was just leaving..." She leant over and picked up a bag, allowing Jack to get a better view of how the top fitted her snugly...

Was it getting hot in there, or was it just him? Daniel seemed to be shifting uncomfortably in his seat, so maybe it wasn't just him after all...

"Ah...about that report...I was just wondering if you wanted the rest of the week to finish it or..." He was having trouble focusing on what he was saying, and stared to the right of her head for a second to compose himself again.

"I have to print it out at home, sir...Siler's fixing the printer in my lab. I didn't have enough time." Of course not, she never did. She was always too focused on her projects.

"Right..." he cleared his throat, fighting the urge to pull at his t-shirt collar like a man attempting to loosen his tie when in fact his jacket and t-shirt were providing him with ventilation. Not enough though, it seemed. "I'll...ah...just be going..."

Sam followed suit, clearing her throat and stuttering. "I'll – um, walk with you, sir..." He noticed she sent a glare at Daniel as she moved past him, and the archaeologist shot back an innocent look.

He had to ensure she was out of his immediate 'airspace' soon or she would see his entirely inappropriate reaction to seeing her after that photograph. Even though his trousers were loose, they weren't _that_ loose.

He glanced sideways at her. "Glad to see you're actually heading home for once – I was worried that I was going to have to order you to get a life again." Although judging by _that_ outfit...

She gave him a smile – one that he knew she reserved just for him. Probably one her more tolerant ones, thrown at him to humour him and his jokes, but still... "I have some work that needs to be completed at home."

He shook his head, feigning horror. "Work? Again?"

She gave him a fully-fledged dazzling grin this time, and he felt warm and fuzzy inside. Although he doubted it was an appropriate emotion for a battle-hardened, sarcastic general.

"So tell me...what's this about Teal'C and photography?" Okay, so he couldn't resist a little dig. He might even get the whole explanation, which would certainly cancel out the sharp remark he might receive for eavesdropping.

Her cheeks went bright red again, and she watched him nervously. God, she was going to kill the other two when she got them alone again. "He – uh – he's taken an interest in photography, sir. Mainly portraiture. He's actually quite good at it. I modelled for him once." _Shit_. Mouth _really_ should consult brain first.

An eyebrow shot up, and she couldn't tell whether it was a calculated move or completely due to her words. "Really?" Oh. He looked thoughtful. That meant trouble.

But he said no more as they reached the elevator and he gestured for her to go first, following her and pressing the correct buttons for their respective floors. He would see her up to the first level of security, then head back down to his office. There was a pile of paperwork with his name on.

* * *

Author's Note: There's an epilogue if people want it? Review and let me know...and yes, it's S/J! 


	4. 04

Author's Note: Okay, since you all pushed my reviews up to 50 (yay!) and seemed to want the epilogue, here you go!

Again, all love to Sam and Jill for challenging me to write this (and Kashoku for checking it over)! Oh, and everyone send love to Sam - she hurt her knee...

* * *

The grin was like super-glue; stuck to his face and for the moment impossible to wipe off. If Teal'C were still in the lab (he had excused himself to retrieve some food from the commissary before the ever-hungry SG-12 – who had just returned a couple of hours ago – took all of his preferred jello) then the burly Jaffa would most likely have had a small smirk on his face. 

The plan had been simple. As soon as Teal'C had shown Daniel the photo, the bookish archaeologist had devised a prank for the General to fall victim to. Knowing the history of the Colonel and General's tentative and unresolved relationship, he hoped it would give them a push in the right direction. Teal'C had been charged in placing the copy of the photo he had given Sam in her lab in full sight of Jack O'Neill when he headed towards her lab, and Daniel had requested a favour from the security team – he would have his photo taken with the majority of the women on the team if they patched through the feed from her lab to see Jack's reaction when his curiosity won over and he took a peek.

Sam hadn't favoured the idea at all – in fact she had protested quite a lot, but after Daniel had convinced her it would sway things in the way that she wanted them to (he could read her like a book, whether or not she liked to admit it), she reluctantly allowed them to go ahead. Not without a lot of embarrassment on her part, of course. Made worse by the fact that the day they decided to pull the prank, she was heading home and the only civvies she had left was _the_ outfit.

Daniel bounced to his coffee percolator and grabbed another mug of his black, liquid lifeline, and picked up his phone. "Sergeant? Yeah, it's me. Could you possibly patch through the feed from the elevators?"

* * *

The doors opened, and Sam reluctantly moved away from her position next to the General. She never realised how warm it could get it the elevators, but now it caused her to shiver as she stepped out into the cool corridor, the chilly air snaking round her and leaving her feeling slightly bereft of her previous position and what had been snaking around her only minutes before. 

"See you in a week, sir," she threw him a look over her shoulder. He was holding the door open, an enigmatic smirk on his face, which she had only seen once before – after he had been through three months of time looping. She hadn't understood it then, but it spoke volumes now, and a small thrill ran through her as she realised that she was the cause of it.

She tugged on her top, trying to get it back into place, and smoothed down her slightly mussed hair.

"Have a nice time, Carter..." He was grinning openly now. "Oh, and if I were you...I'd warm your hands up before you try that again."

She blushed again. "Yours weren't exactly warm, general." Composing herself, she couldn't resist one last jab. "You have lipstick right there..." she pointed delicately to the corner of her own mouth, and grinned triumphantly when he rubbed quickly at that spot on his own face with his hand and checked it, before realising she hadn't actually been wearing lipstick. He scowled at her.

"Low blow."

"Goodbye, sir." She turned on her heel and walked – no, _floated_ (at least, it certainly felt like her feet weren't touching the ground) – down the corridor to the first security checkpoint.

He shook his head, watching her as the doors shut and the elevator started moving downwards, taking him to Level 28. General Jack O'Neill would never be able to look at Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter in the same way again.

She was a damn good kisser.

* * *

Author's Note: I've really enjoyed writing this and certainly surprised myself, since I can never usually write humour and romance. But thanks for the amazing reviews, and a big thanks to the 17 people who added me to their watch list! I've never had that amount of people add me in such a small time span! Keep checking back...I have a few ideas for another S/J fic, but I just have to get my AS exams out the way first. Love you all! 


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